Sunday, April 16, 2006

i'm tired of this world...i want to get off

alright, i'll admit it. i'm terribly pathetic and constantly suicidal. these thoughts infiltrate my head daily, hourly, practically every second. somehow i find ways to keep the struggle alive. for instance, i still realize that there are a handful of people that would be damaged by my actions. life would go on though; it always does.
i remember those shining moments of days and nights passed when unexplicable happiness resided within me and wonder if i would really miss more of them. and i would. i read letters of those who have opted for that lonely road... enough said.
i take solace in the intangible things that are mine forever. they won't go away even if i wanted them to.
so instead, i'll write some poetry and cry and when i'm finished with that, i'll smoke a cigarette and have a cup of coffee and keep telling myself, "it can't rain all the time."

1 comment:

K. said...

Seriously. Grey skies and 13 hour sleep habits are hand in hand with me. That wonderful sun. It makes me so happy. Today I wish it would come out and play. I took this test to see where my "ideal" cities are and they don't seem to be that sunny. Maybe you'll have more luck: findmyspot(dot)com

I like the blog. But maybe that's because I'm supping a cup of joe right now.